Privacy and Discretion
I know that for many of you, a major concern is your own privacy. Whether you’re married to someone, known in the public realm, exploring something personal, or just feel like your-business-is-your-business-and-no-one-else’s: your privacy is a priority. If other people were to find out that you were seeing me, or even contacting me, it could have negative consequences.
I don’t want to bring any negativity into your life. In fact, my goal is to enhance your life.
With that in mind, please remember three things:
- I will not initiate calls to see if you want to get together again.
- I will not initiate calls just to chat.
- If I do ever need to call you, I will be very discreet.
Let’s say we got together, and afterwards I found that you’d left your sunglasses at my place. If I couldn’t email you, I would call – but start the conversation in this way:
Me: “Hello, Chris?”
You: “Uhhhh… yes?”
Me: “Hi, this is Dave. I saw you yesterday. Can you talk right now?”
You: “Um, no… sorry.”
Me: “OK, no problem – can you call me later?”
You: “Yes, thanks.”
Me: “Great. If I don’t hear from you by tomorrow, I’ll call again, is that all right?”
You: “No, sorry.”
Me: “OK, no problem, I’ll look forward to hearing back from you. Thanks, bye.”
No discussion about what I do, who I am, or the fact that your sunglasses are in my studio. No phone numbers exchanged (I figure you know how to reach me). No awkwardness on the phone. You can hang up and even turn to whomever you’re with and say, “Ugh, those phone solicitors can be so irritating!”
Voicemail messages left by me are handled in a similarly discreet fashion. “Hi, this is Dave, please call me when you have a minute, I’m at 703-927-2759.”
Now, let’s say a snoopy spouse or partner checks your phone calls. First of all, my phone number is blocked, so if I call you (remember, you left your glasses at my place – I just want to let you know somehow!) my number will come up as “restricted.” If you called me, and the snoop checks your “recently dialed calls” list and follows up with me, rest assured: I’m not givin’ out nuthin’. I am careful in my conversations with people I don’t know, and will not give out information unless I know how that person found me first.
And I believe this bears repeating: I will not call you out of the blue. You might have had an appointment with me two years ago, and even though we may have had an incredible time, and I would be very happy to see you again — I am not going to contact you. I will wait for you to get in touch with me.
Respect for your privacy. You’ll definitely get it.